I've been told recently that love is a mix of chemicals in your brain with the end result being reproduction. It seems like no one really wants to get into the nitty-gritty of what love actually is. I think people would like to believe that you can feel something deep for someone, and it's love, and then the next day, you don't have to feel it anymore, so you just "fell out of love."
I don't think that that's the case. Look at the man who's been married for 30 years, and has an affair. Did he fall out of love with his wife? It's possible that he may not feel attraction toward her as he once did, but love is not something that you can fall in and out of. Love is a choice. And I know, I just know, that someone is going to have my head over that statement, but, ladies and gentlemen, love is a choice. Feelings are fickle. Feelings go away when someone is mean to you. (And don't go applying this blog to MY life, you people.)
I think what we fail to forget is when God says to love our enemies (Matt. 5:43-48). And yknow what? It sucks to do that. I'm not gonna lie. It sucks to have to love someone that hates you, or pray for someone that you'd rather have hit by a truck. Repeatedly. But this is what God calls us to do: He said, love your enemies. Pray for those who persecute you. So that's what we have to do.
Love is a choice, because anyone can have feelings for someone. It's what you do with those feelings that shapes who you are. For example, you can choose to show love to someone through intimacy with them - but what happens when you're old and wrinkly? Will it be difficult to show love then? We haven't learned how to love people correctly. We haven't learned how to deal with people that annoy us. We haven't learned that love is a choice. Words from my very wise mother: love is washing someone's dirty socks every day for the rest of your life.
But I'm not just talking about romantic love, you guys. I'm talking about the real stuff. I'm talking about the stuff that isn't made of chemicals and isn't an endorphin rush when you talk to someone. I'm talking about really loving people. And yknow what? I don't have it down. Not at all. In fact, I've barely even made a dent in truly loving people. I mess up all the time. Just go ahead and ask anyone around me. But I'm trying.
Where do you even start to love other people? Let me tell you...it is not an easy thing. First off...think of someone that you do not get along with. Maybe it's someone that you dislike strongly. Then pray for them. Hard, isn't it? Well, it'll get better. Here's the scary thing though: you can't stop. You have to pray for them every day...and it's going to take patience. Another scary thing to pray for. When you pray for them, God will show you in what ways He wants you to act in love toward them. So...live it out. Live out love. Live it out loud. Because there is a world of hurting, lonely, desperate people out there who just need someone to love them. Show people God's love, because in the end, that's all that matters.
2 comments:
you're amazing Rina. I love you.
You are right - it's very hard to pray for someone who is hurtful towards you and continues to be. But I think when we pray for them, it also gives that burden to God so that it doesn't dwell with you.
Choosing to love is a good reminder - all the time.
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